[Jumpy]

moonlight spears the trees.
ancient lights upon the sky.
i lay there to rest.


I've always wondered how the people behind those great white walls were. Their buildings were always so shiny, sparkling white, pure and clean. Then I was forced to figure out how those people were when they captured me. I've made friends. Friendships that last even to this day. I'd be a poser if I were to pretend I had real enemies; the people who wanted to kill me were always weak, jokes, died without me ever meeting them, and so forth. Even the Supreme never dared to take her chances fighting against me. It wasn't worth risking her life against a man who had nothing to lose.

I've been to every corner of Esshar. I've met people I hated before they even spoke. I've met people I loved before they could muster the courage to speak. I still can't help but think of Alice sometimes. It feels wrong, like I'm cheatin' on Ella. Always go and get the person you love, don't just watch as someone else takes them away from you like Berrios did. And don't hold your pride and your morals so high that you don't listen to your fiancée crying her heart out to you, like me. Maybe I think of her because she's my only regret.

Would you ever believe an Osronan Princess was ready to name her firstborn daughter a Rhoynish name?

Iberl only reached out to me fully after I nearly pissed my pants in Ophelia's home. I wonder if anyone else ever figured out how scary she could be. Marie told me that it was impossible for me to make the stars shine just for Alice's sake, she got mad at me for it, thinking I was ready to die and all. Overdramatic. No wonder she broke down that hard that night on the bridge, she's just so emotional. So repressed. Still, she was my best friend for the longest time.

... Eirene kinda was, too, wasn't she? Up until Osrona went up in flames and she vanished away to be protected by what remained of the Kingdom. I've called Alexander my best friend as well, though he went and ruined it all with pride. Took him about twenty years to admit that he was wrong, that he'd made a mistake. Twenty years and Sethon being nearly killed, that is. If you ever wanted to meet the most stubborn of all Kings...

Another man who wore a crown was my best friend by the end of it all. He's the only one still around from the old gang. Sure, he's a spirit and he's in the Vale and he's probably way happier than I am with Amalia, but Finley... If you can read my thoughts let it be known that I'll never call you "Finn". That's just extra lame. Hey, remember when Nebula made you drink a lust potion? That witch never understood why it was wrong to mess with food. She never took the time to get her ass kicked by Tea. Though my sister died way too early. Even if she was nuts by that point I wish I could've done something. I wish it wouldn't have taken me that long to figure out a way to help people.

I wonder if Elesius ever got around to telling his kids that he was alive only 'cause I let him. I wonder if— No... Sythaeryn's definitely pissed that I didn't fight him with my fists. He'd be even more pissed if he figured out that I got one of Vartuul's scales off of Elesius after that. Kind of a... thank you gift. A mercy gift. Weird guy that Soleis.

You know... I never felt like I taught Kabal enough about our people. Or Ilsa for that matter. She could dance, she would've loved t'learn the traditions and to be there at festivals mesmerizing everyone I'm sure. I remember the time she slapped me with her hair just 'cause I complimented her. She really was a Rhoynish. I'm starting to believe that being Rhoynish isn't always about the race either. Basten was as far from Rhoynish as you could be, and he was born one. Cassius wasn't born one but he fought, thought, and acted like the greatest sea-Rhoynish I've ever seen. I'm sorry I couldn't keep him safe, Ella.

Tea and Mo'Cha never really got along, but I think they've both ended up in places they liked with people they loved. And that's all that should matter in the end, isn't it? Romani never understood that, I don't think. He was... He left his kids when they needed him most. Anthonio went nuts real fast and he never wanted my help. Even if he married Parsley she knew, she noticed that he wasn't all that right. She left real fast after that.

I think Rella still thinks that I never figured out she was working against Esshar the whole time. My talents don't change people and that girl? That girl lied. She lied a lot. She was hurt, heartbroken, and filled with emotions that no one could really fix. But I think it's better I let her be where she wanted. Sure... I miss messing with her, but she's happy. I think.

Speaking of friends leaving I can't believe Yoshiko ditched me before I was done there. Then again I didn't visit her nearly as much as I should have. That dance we had was... nice. A bit too perfect for my taste, almost as if I should've pursued an old friend for more than a waltz together. But she's too young for me. Way too young. I don't think her son ever really understood what it takes to be a great man either. Haruki's... nearly there, but he failed where he needed to succeed. He stepped away when he needed to step in. They made the kid a groundskeeper after building a whole school right ontop of his land.

Reminds me of when we first fought for Starfall all those years ago. Mom was pissed that Myllenoris and Osrona were making a whole bridge from side to side after we'd trampled them on the battlefield. She said her only ally was Rinn. Crazy the way she died. Well, not as crazy as the whole uprising and killin' that Sythaeryn did that day, slaying Dragonlord after Dragonlord. I had to stop Biru back then from killin' herself. She became a.. bit better after that. Less caught by her addiction.

You know who else went nuts? Del. Can't believe she used to be unable to even speak out loud around people. I knew that it didn't make her weird when I heard her unable to hold back laughs after I smacked Romani with the Codex. She was trying to scold me over it but she barely managed. At least I managed to get her staff to the son she left behind.

I've raised too many kids. Even Anise was acting like he belong when all he did was miss the boat with his parents. I had no choice but to look after the kid. Good thing that one turned out well. Though he was a massive nerd.

Ah...

Pericles and Asta were much better in their lives than they were as crazy copies of themselves. To think the White Witch of all people would play truth or dare with us. There's so many people that didn't get on her good side, they didn't get to see that she was still a person underneath all the leadership and the insanity.

All my life I've worked to give people the freedom of mind they needed to make mistakes they could control. I didn't want to see people die like my sister did or beg to be killed like Edelaide did. Would you ever believe it if I told you that my first love was a witch? She's also the one that forced me to listen to my instinct. It could've cost her her life, though. I didn't understand why she wanted me to tell her the truth, to end up angry, yelling choking her down in the sand just to hear that she was hurting me by not being ready to... love.

... I guess that she loved me more than I could ever imagine. She kept me away from her dark business and made sure that I wouldn't be dragged down to the depths of Hel with her by the end of it all.

Jokes on you, Edelaide, I'm coming down to Hel to kick your ass for being an idiot anyway.

I wonder how many people are gonna be bummed out when they figure out my time's passed.



Later, kids.