Ems Vorenii's Test Log

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Preface: This experiment was conducted to test the effects of Test#017, the most recent recipe produced of the concoction " J e s t e r   J u i c e ", to be referred to as 'JJ' from this point onward. This experiment was conducted on an unknowing patron after a brief cardiovascular check-up had been performed by the administrator of the drug. The method of ingestion was an apple, which the subject had fully consumed upon retrieval, after which, the subject was told a variety of jokes to gauge potency. Below is a detailed log of the occurrence.

Subject name: Yiras Tobias

Subject age: 19

Location: Achyon gate

Time: Evening, 1845

Substance Information: Test#017 of JJ serves to maximize the positive uses of the potion, while minimizing the crippling effects that come both from being incapable of controlling one's laughter, and the depressing nature of the 'crash,' when the potion's effects wear off. Included in this recipe are traces of soothing reed and sinka, aiming to provide relief to the sensation of the 'gut busting' ailment.

Experimenter information: Experimenter is a certified medic, as well as a master Alchemist. Interest involving this experiment stems from her desire to perfect this recipe, in order to offer it to the public for sale.


Procedure: Subject, to be referred to as 'YT' from this point on, approached experimenter, to be referred to as 'EX' from this point on, outside of the gate of Achyon one evening. The weather was fair, and there were no clouds in the sky.

-EX detected no physical abnormalities within YT, and concluded he was of sound physical condition.

-YT was offered an apple after some casual discussion.

-YT happily accepted the apple, and consumed it in its entirety.

-Effects of JJ occurred rapidly, as the subject was soon incapable of containing his laughter.

-EX provided several jokes to YT to gauge level of delight.

Below are a list of jokes provided to the subject:

What do you call a well-dressed, crime-solving alligator?

...


An investigator!

What's brown, and sticky, and bad for your teeth?

...


A stick!

Did you hear the one about the guy who had his left-half disintegrated?

...


It's okay, he's all right now!

-YT laughed heartily at all of these jokes.

-EX monitored vitals and organs as YT laughed.


Conclusion: Data gathered suggests that Test#017 be solidified as the recipe for JJ.

Test complete.

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Preface: The creation of experiment "ROUSE#02" was one that caused ethical concerns among the board of medicine. Experimenter Ems Vorenii sought to create a lust potion that produced tender feelings and an increased sensitivity to petting and cuddles. While in production, experiment "ROUSE#02" met an un-foreseen issue, where the affected apples got mixed with the unaffected apples. After much toil and trouble, the experimenter narrowed the apples down to four possible instances; Two of which were spiked with experiment "ROUSE#02" and two left unchanged.

Subject names: Yiras Tobias, Diana, Shiffty, Ems Vorenii*

Location: Academy Gymnasium

Time: Morning, 1846

Substance Information: "ROUSE#02" is a lust potion with slightly altered effects. Experimenter sought to remove the sexual aspect of the potion and emphasize the affectionate aspect. The goal of this potion was to enable those struggling with intimacy and affection with their partners the chance to prove that they are capable of love, it's just been a long day and I just want to watch the football game and drink a beer.

Experimenter information: Experimenter is a certified medic, as well as a master Alchemist. Interest involving this experiment is a result of the marketing department's insistence that there wasn't enough love in the world, and a potion that was effectively liquid love would sell like hotcakes.


Procedure: Subjects shall be referred to as "YT", "DIA", "SHI", and "EV" respectively from this point on. Substance "ROUSE#02" will be referred to as "R02" from this point on. It should be noted that the experimenter took part in this experiment, and is one of the test subjects at her own discretion. Ems Vorenii shall also be referred to as "EX" when applicable.

-EX arrives at Academy.

-EX locates subjects YT and SHI by DIA's direction.

-YT refuses to consume the apple, trades with EV, who agrees to eat one with him if it will calm his nerves.

-DIA and SHI are given the remaining two apples.

-EV counts down from five for everyone to eat their apples.

-EV's apple is uncontaminated. It should be noted that YT traded this apple away.

-YT's apple is affected by the potion. See notes below.

-SHI claims to have eaten his apple, though EX suspects otherwise. No effect.

-DIA also claims to have eaten her apple. EX suspects otherwise. See notes below.

YT's results:

YT noticed the effects of the potion immediately, and shut his eyes. He turned away from everyone and refused to let the potion take full effect.

SHI tried to goad YT to look at him, though this was proven ineffective.

EX administered 'Drawing of some woman'(Appendix 1) to YT to coax the subject to comply.

YT looked at the image, then drank an invisibility potion.

DIA's results:

DIA had given her apple to someone else and insisted he consume it. External Subject will be referred to as "ES" from this point on.

ES left anonymous, as they didn't sign the waiver.

ES was skeptical, though DIA convinced him to have the apple.

ES expressed interest in eating the apple later at home.

ES was coaxed into eating it by DIA.

No effect.

Conclusion: Insufficient data regarding the real effects of "ROUSE#02", test cannot be used as a means of justification for this recipe. Further testing required before this product may be released to the public.

By discretion of the examiner, this experiment has been put on indefinite hiatus.

Experiment Terminated.




Appendix 1: