Misadventures Of A Goblin

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Mungo!
~King of all Goblins~

Dea' readah, ya probly wundrin 'ow I got inta this mess, intya?

Well don' stress, coz Ol' Mungo's bout to giv' ya the rundown by means'a literary skills.



A lil background might be in ordah, so long story short iz I was a King, a King of all Gobbo's.
I'd rides me battle Trollz inta the thick of it n' havvem munch any and all in my way.
Mens, womens, and childrens, draggin' 'em off back to me home for dinnahs.

But dat all changed one fate filled day, it sure did.



I's was raidin' sum dock in sum backwater village, diggin' about in da barrels looking for fishe,
Alluvasudden, a big ol' shark boy came runnin' out, steel at the ready n' such,
Swingin' it 'bout at me Gobbo mates and rantin' n' ravin' 'bout sum Deep Watah Company nonsense,
Usin' me quick wit, I's slammed shut me barrel and hid undah the fishe's.
N' that was tha last time I saw me home n' Kingdom.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I's was in dat barrel for months, gnawin' at fishe bones and nibblin' at the rottens meats,
One day I jus' got sickuvit, so I smacked open da lid and crawled on out,
But there weren't no shark bois, they'd all up n' left!
Makin' me way inta the nearest cavern I could find I's came upon a strange place,
A place called da MIAH, fulla strange creatures and bone bags!

Awh, it's 'orrible, the battle trollz don't let me ride 'em and theys all bonka's ova theys mutha!

Due to 'em bein' so 'orrible, Ol' Mungo said bugger it and wen't lookin' for snacks,
They's was a school not far from it, so I tried to nibble on sum childrens,
But---


A filthy furbag busted up Mungo's nose,
Left me bleedin' in the dirt whimperin' n' sobbin',
So's for the time beins, I'll be stickin' with those of the MIAH,
Who knows, might be able to ride one of dem battle trollz yet.