The Animus Apocrypha

[Laemor]

"Where did it all begin... Oh... I remember now."
          

Humanities fragility is exceptionally precious under times of intense exposure to despair... It was this thought, this nightmare... That gave birth to I. Irkalla... I was without shape, without meaning. Lost, yet never found. Hiding away in the shadows of man. Blending in as though I was, but natural to their existence. From person-to-person, I went. In search of a meaning behind it all, but to no avail. I found, nothing, but the sight of what could become of humanity. Should they excel, should they fail... With these memories, I take with me... Mans mistake, their accomplishments. To mold a future, inescapable to the ignorant. All shall learn, all shall realize. 

I can only live where there is light, but if I die... It'll be from the light shining on me...
What am I?

[Laemor]

Humanities thirst for blood out-weighs...

Their quest for knowledge...

It is... The combination of both...

That birthed I...

The visceral experiences had never come to truly flourish around me... Until the time of war had come. Its this first experience where I'd been confronted by the man who seeks to usher in our kind as sport to slaughter. That I felt the essences in me beginning to resonate. A plethora of factors compounded onto themselves and suddenly i'd begun finding myself...

Harboring their emotions...
Disgusting...

 But maybe i'd been the one to jeopardize myself in the first place. Ignorant to assume I could stave face through ascension. That i'd been better than man, but in the face of the High-Lord? In the face of bloodshed cast around me...

I could only laugh and follow through. Left to enjoy what could've been my final hours. Left to be baptized by the mans scrutinizing gaze. As if they were, better, than us? I'd been forced to set the measures and allow humanity to bare witness to the void they tried to quell. Filling it their hatred, only coming to find the birth of something much more coming through...

Irkalla... It means, death. It means, an end...

But I am no fool. The end isn't truly that, but a beginning to something more. I wish to see. What lies beyond the bloodshed, beyond the fallen gods. Can man still stand on their own? I wonder... 

I will find out, this. I promise.

[Laemor]

"Humanities writings are rather. Poetic. Depictions of fallen heroes to rise amidst the chaos, the crisis man-kind faces on Esshar. Will usher onto the island. An Era of Mythical proportions. And yet I can't help, but wonder. To what heights will they come to climb in-order to see a brighter tomorrow. After-all...
  
The brighter the light, the greater the shadow.
  
My being cast into the night. Where no longer could the thoughts of my studies progress me any further... No... I require, bodies. Sacrifices. 
  
I require... More."

  

[Laemor]

The time is finally upon us...
Let the islands thirst be satiated by the rivers of blood...
By the accumulation of humanities failures...
I deem thee, unfit...
Finn
I am coming for you...
    

How quickly three years would come to pass... It feels almost like yesterday. That I danced on the fields of war with him. A man among children. If only they could redirect their desire to free the land from demon-kind. To the evolution of their own race, as a whole. Bound by this deity who whispers into their ear, tells them to bride the island of. Me... Of my kind... I can only do what nature requires of me. To survive, thrive. During these tense moments. And as each day passed, I noticed the determination in some beginning to wane. They can tell, they can... Feel it. The difference between them and. I. Yet only through combat do most come to this realization. Without my magics? Would humanity not be, but trapped in stagnation?
  
Am I truly the demon this world projects me to be?

Or am I simply this way... Because they forced me to be?

Questions that find no answers, even in my ascension. I thought maybe... He could give me those answers. That he could tell me, what it is. That truly makes me. Unnatural. Why must I raise my hand to treat humanity like children and spank them? Why do I see something in some, but nothing in others? My studies over the soul are quickly coming to a close... But no matter how far I dig. I only find myself wanting, more. Seeking more, from every answer.
  
Came a hundred more questions.

[Laemor]

You...
Me...
It's just us on this terrible island... 
The Dark Lord desires to see us succeed...
So, I will do what I must. Whatever it takes...
For my kindreds lives? Are at stake...
     

I'd taken you from your place in Hel'Heim... During a moment of desperation. You came to my aid... The Dark Lords gift. Yet... I can't yet fathom to what you look like. Still, a mist, shapeless... But worry not. I will ensure you are completed. In the end? You will truly be the only one at my side. When Death comes for me. But before then? I shall get to know you... Everything. From beginning. To End.

  

Why did you come in a moment of weakness? Are you my savior to fight back against humanity? Or merely the one who observes my final hour?

  

If only the island could come to understand from my perspective. How... Perfect you are. In due time however. They'll learn. All of them.

  

And Amalia Ghede too....

[Laemor]

Look at the sky tonight...
All those stars, have a reason...
I know my actions aren't perceived as important...
But if I found a way to save us all... 
Would you walk it with me?

   

Where are you, when the morning sets? Losing patience, is that why you told me. One day, i'll be lost at sea? Because this mind cannot ease to wander nor wonder. Falling to pieces whenever forced to watch the tumultuous fate of my kindred, as if the words of humanity spoken were an undeniable truth that couldn't be avoided... It's within this unavoidable concept however... They all begin opening up to me...
   
And I realize to what my family sees me as. 
   
My existence however not nearly as cherished by myself, as it was to those around me. To those who could understand the madness that came with seeking knowledge. I always found it funny, once they grow comfortable with you. They look to you, to keep them together. Keep them; Whole.
    
What... Humane thoughts. Actions...
   
However, it is through these mundane expressions, that give weigh to motivation. To desire. To creativity. As the first to ascend amidst my generation, maybe I was fool... To merely remain as support for those who'd press on. To merely watch from the sidelines, offering my being to their goals. 
   
With the loss of Muulimnir, Luxa, Jaeger, Morok and many more....
   
I've decided to no longer remain as I am now... 
   
I will lead my kind to salvation and it won't be until it's too late to stop us. 
That humanity realizes. I. Irkalla.
Am Eternal.