[Carbon]

Stashed away in rustic antique studies of Vivri Lillia, now the background lady Avarion, could be found something forgotten and discarded. Secrets buried, truths never unveiled to those that she holds close. 

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“Love, sanity, rest. I gave it all away when I came to Dal’thala.

Yet for what? The truths of the world conceal themselves away from me even now, as I lie in bed with darkness. 

I thought I wasn’t meant for greatness, for love or clarity. Yet then I met Him, the one beacon of light that shines through my entire existence. Lionel, my star - my love.

Yet each moment I stare into the vastness of his eyes I am filled with naught but guilt, each moment he hangs his woes on my shoulders I am gravitated to the core of our world, anchored by my own folly. 

How stupid could I be?

For I signed it all away before I could even give life a true meaning, a true purpose. I attempted to fly before even learning how to walk. I built everything up on a lie. One that became all too true.

Yet now I sit, contemplating it all. Regretting ever even stepping into that tower. For I may have forsaken one part of me, my heart I was not ready to give. I will not betray the feelings I hold, even if I must live in misery for the rest of eternity.

I’ll suffer, for him.

Why am I even writing this? I could never say it to him directly, the hurt in his eyes would be too much for my heart to bare. For he’d know the sins I committed, the strings I’ve pulled. All for him.

Yet he didn’t ask me of this, nobody did. 

A part of me still woes, prays and hopes to merciful Gods that he does find this. Maybe, one day he’ll know the truth. Of the mistakes I have made to be where I am.

I didn’t just lose faith in Nemea, but myself.

It’s better that I simply fade into the background, exist without lifting any brows. I can no longer weigh my dearest with the burden of my life. Perhaps our children can right my wrongs, but even that is too big an ask.

I have failed, everybody and everything. 

So now I will live, in regret and fear for the rest of my days.

Praying that somebody finds this and ends my folly with a true act of mercy.

I love you Lionel, I hope if you ever read this you find it in your heart to forgive me.”

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The exact date of when the Lady Avarion may have written this is unknown, but the paper on inspection seemed aged and wrinkled. Light patches of water damage could be seen smearing some of this ink.