10-19-2023, 10:20 PM
![[Image: nqjvBtu.png]](https://i.imgur.com/nqjvBtu.png)
The Self.
These ideas have been fervently drilled into my head as far back as I can remember. In order to become a better person, one needs to search within their very soul in order to push forward and see just how far one can get. I need to live my life to the fullest so I can experience all that life has to offer, but I must tiptoe carefully so as not to find myself tumbling into the endless dark abyss that I wouldn't be able to escape from. I've found that I like the tedious and yet monotonous job of mining through this quest of mine; the cramped quarters buried beneath the earth soothes my world-weary soul and I find myself lost in the valuables I'm able to collect.
Beyond paying off this debt, I unfortunately have little need for money for right now. But it's nice to have, like a cushion that's sat under me in case of emergencies. Something that is my own, and earned by my own hand. Many have offered to give me money to help with the debt but I've refused them all, as it doesn't feel fair. Is it foolish to deny it when I know what lays in store for me should I fail, or is my desire to see this corrected by my own hand the more noble move?
Bit by bit I'm learning more. I've learned what a 'tweak' is, and I've smoked my first cigarette. It wasn't great, but I still tried it so I could say in the end that yes I've tried all of these things. I want to experience more and more so then at the End, I can offer these to Him with my entire heart.
I never tried to keep a diary before and so I hope I'm doing this correctly. Perhaps by writing down my thoughts, I'll be able to explore more of not just the world but the true self that lays within as well.
Beyond paying off this debt, I unfortunately have little need for money for right now. But it's nice to have, like a cushion that's sat under me in case of emergencies. Something that is my own, and earned by my own hand. Many have offered to give me money to help with the debt but I've refused them all, as it doesn't feel fair. Is it foolish to deny it when I know what lays in store for me should I fail, or is my desire to see this corrected by my own hand the more noble move?
Bit by bit I'm learning more. I've learned what a 'tweak' is, and I've smoked my first cigarette. It wasn't great, but I still tried it so I could say in the end that yes I've tried all of these things. I want to experience more and more so then at the End, I can offer these to Him with my entire heart.
I never tried to keep a diary before and so I hope I'm doing this correctly. Perhaps by writing down my thoughts, I'll be able to explore more of not just the world but the true self that lays within as well.