I Don't Know Who I Am

[ry0un0suke]

. . .

I cannot will the words out of my throat. Regretful eternally for my foolishness. No person in their right mind should look at me and see wisdom. I am not wise. Ask nothing of me, hope nothing of me, expect nothing of me,

. . .

I have no confidence

in myself

or my abilities.

I have no abilities.

Whatever people think they see

are false images painted by their mind's eye.

Subscribing something to me

which is untrue.

Say one thing,

while I wholeheartedly believe another,

as if in constant conflict

attempting to prove me wrong.

I am not wise

and never said I was.

But I must pretend

because people say I am.

And it is getting worse

by the day.

The colors are bright

in my trial.

The sounds are loud

in my hunt.

The feelings

tear me to shreds from the inside.

I cannot lie to you

even if I want to so badly.

I feel great and for every second I do,

I cannot bear the excruciating pain

on my spirit.

Make it go away.