To whoever Reads my journal i have but one question
A simple question i have but to ask

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What is love?
Can you define it?

--

Many times i have asked myself that question on what love truly is
Some would say with my own Kind.. but its strange

Another question if i may

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Is it wrong to love a Fairy?
Even if you know deep down the corruption is inside of you

Will Yggdrasil still love me even after all that i have told you?

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The rainbow is something i wish to see
To fully connect and befriend all Fae
..is it foolish of me to try?
to one day Die and go be with the Yggdrasil and rest under her sweet Canopy?


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Time.. is all i have, for once my lover returns to me
I shall plan a wedding in the Great mothers name
May her loving embrace echo to all the Fae across Meranthe
But for now..

I wait.. and i find out

Today was another Fruitful day
Treating the Sick and needy, doing my roles as a medic
but it was not just that, that sparked my interest

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A letter?!
from who.. who might it be?
My dear lover
You return so soon.. so close back in my arms
may Yggdrasil Dance and praise for your return
We have so much to catch up on my Dear Fae

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A beautiful Rainbow will be shed on the night you return fully to Meranthe.. so close..
Its Driving me crazy! 
Return home so we may fully speak under the same place we met..
a question of what i will ask of you my Dear Fairy
You will one day learn so much and see so many things

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The fact you still love me when though i am attuned to that of darkness just shocks me
Do you wish to go dark? are you not afraid of our paths..
...
...

Very well then.. i know what you will say before you even arrive fully my love to speak it in words...
The Bells in the distance i can hear them!
so close.. so soon! we will reunite my dear!

--

Once you return fully from your adventures.. i shall ask you that one simple Question..
we missed so much but once i hear your answer.. 
Then our Destiny's will fully shape and play out

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Anticipation 
Can you define it for me?

For that is how I'm feeling this very day.. yearning for your arrival..
Soon my love..
Soon..



 

Today i gathered and watched a War take place
So many witches and demons i knew..
the people of Vdalion and all sorts
I could of fought but.. what side do i pick?
no..best i not even help

~~

One feline called out in 'Stede Vanes' name and to that
its.. different to see people carry on a dead persons legacy
will they do the same for me?
Even after they see all of me?
will my fairy carry on my legacy?

~~

its quite alright.. though watching the two imperfects cut down.. only pained me for a second
It always hurts watching the people you know get slayed and gone
Back to the Helhiem you go, goodbye Varrach.. and Sak'noth

~~

I did not stay for the rest but.. so many people got captured and an explosion of Vdalion.. oh gosh..
so many deaths.. i shielded the fairy i met from the lava and ash and helped them escape
Darkness is coming and.. its the fate of meranthe to fight and keep going

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When will i fight?
Soon.
Very soon..
for now me and my Lover sit on the sides..
and watch the fireworks.. its not my time for battle
But soon it will be..
but for now i pour my drink.. and just wait..

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Patience
Can you define it?

The act of being able to tolerate something without being angry or upset.

Today was like any other day
Quests to be done.. people to see
a simple day..
All of it changed..

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A visit
is what i took.. back to an old place 
just for a second
just to see an old friend
only for them to drop me their belongings
why? don't you need them..
~~
Silence was given from a siren i saw as family
The one i knew since i sailed to Meranthe
Wasabi
why did you do it Wasabi..
~~
Bringing them back into the tavern i did
They simply told me how it was pointless
Death was a blissful End for them
And without a second to remain
They plunged their Weapon into their heart and ended their life.. right in my face..
So Selfless.. Wasabi.. why did you do it..
~~
Screaming and tears ran down me and my friends face as i grabbed the siren who took his own life
Confused.. my darkness took over and i hoisted their body on my shoulder and Swam home..
There i laid them to rest.. you selfless fool.. i cried as i did so.. i hated every second of it..

I could have saved you
Yet you took your own life?!

we where family till the end?!

You pawned off your tavern to your Friend
As all they could do is sit in sadness
as I told them you killed yourself?!

~~
Thus ends the life of a friend i thought i knew..
Shame.. we could of been friends till the end..
guess you decided enough was enough
And to leave a lasting memory.. congratulations.. YOU DID

~~
Betrayal
Can you Define it?

The Violation of a persons trust or Confidence

Study Study Study..
Its all im doing now but its needed
My time is spent in my house studying and researching
The mind is a Sea of endless knowledge and we are but a blank slate

~~
Most people will tell you they Dream Big
well.. ill tell you this, Anyone can dream big
its the question of what do YOU want to do
To Achieve such goals you have set in mind?

~~
...
My goals? oh please.. its like anyone elses
I wish to see change
People talk big
Some decide to sit out and watch
Hel.. me included..
But no..
~~
I sit and wait just like i said i would
The time is coming, its very soon but for now i wait
Marriage and Happiness will always come first
But knowledge will always be a hard second for me
Me and my Fairy are happy as can be studying together
though i do have to wonder

~~
Knowledge comes to all, some willingly and some with a price for such
Remember that.. Nothing is free in Meranthe
EVERYTHING, has a price
Holy and Occult
Necromancy and Faith
Wayfinding and Riftmancy
Factions and Rebels
Wars and Peace
Friends and Enemys
Trust.. and Betrayal 

~~
Everything has a counter opposite to it
You want peace.. what will you PAY for that peace?
You want to be the King? or you want to learn an ancient magic of some sorts
What will you pay for such knowledge or power? Killing?, stealing?, lying?, what will you pay
For what Dreams and Knowledge you desire.. come on tell me.. ill wait

~~
Determination
Can You Define it?

A Firm or Fixed intention to Achieve a Desired End

I set up a shop out of boredom
"lets sell potions for cheap on an island"
i told myself..
and you know what.. business is booming

~~
I decided to Use an island all by my lonesome and Find myself a Person to advertise my potions
He said yes.. funny thing is.. hes tied to no factions and that only brings in more customers?
So what if a demon or witch buys my potions? you act like i would monitor my shop and stop them myself..

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The rules where simple.. i have what you want
You buy it for cheap
And carry on.. its simple business
Some people can't walk into citys..
thats where my shop rises where others are limited

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But you know what is really funny..
I have all these coins clinging and jingling in bags.. yet 
Its not filling this part of me in my heart..

Gold rings.. houses.. i can rent out a tavern 
And have a wonderful Date night with my fairy..
Its all wonderful but.. its just.. MONEY
i could put a bounty on someone and have them killed..
yet i just.. don't care.. all these coins are just a side hobby..

Today is the day..
I gathered my things, grabbed all my coins
I woke my Fairy up and asked her the question
i told you ide ask you when we are ready..

~~
on one knee i went as i asked the question you have been dying to hear
"will you marry me?"
the tears that streamed down your face as you said yes
Finally.. i found it.. the love i desired and the happiness i felt

~~
A simple ring i forged and binded our souls to it 
A low echo it would make as you could hear my heartbeat and i would yours
I felt so happy, but i asked you many nights ago that i want to leave meranthe..
So i asked again and you simply kissed me and nodded

~~
The coins i gathered from our shop
i felt it as you hugged me.. The Fae aura..
Darker in color due to occult.. yet you still loved me the same
our rainbows mixed the dark and the light before a simple Smile came on my face
As Tears rolled down my face

~~
I have left meranthe and seen what i wanted to see..
My now Wife with me i feel.. complete im not scared anymore
The night i told you what i am.. you loved me, when i said im occult.. you loved me
I was so blind to what i actually wanted

~~
Looking back to Meranthe all i can do is wave and smile
Goodbye, Rutnar,Vel'sul, Julianne, Ela, Kaname and Win'gul and Deslar
I leave now and leave the rest to all of you
To the Fairys i return with my wife
Maybe ill return.. who knows.. all i know is.. remember me!
just know im happy and found my purpose

~~
And with that Ala'sways Story comes to a close
To spend the rest of her years and years with Her fairy
To be with her Fairys and to love them as they accept her
To fight and be by them till the end

Quote:To the Hel'hiem and back.. eternity and so on, thick and thin and until the very end
I told you ide put a ring on your finger and here i am doing my part.. now we leave..
To grow old and die together.. lets go Dear.. our new life awaits..